There is one feeling that far outweighs any other in early pregnancy and that is fear.
You don’t really think about it before pregnancy, everything is geared towards getting that positive result, yes you’re frightened that you’ll get a BFN (big fat negative) but once you’re actually pregnant, the fear is on a whole other level.
For the first few weeks every single twinge, pain or funny feeling sends waves of fear racing through your veins and the panic sets in. I have never been so frightened to go to the toilet through fear of what I mind find. I’m 5weeks 6 days today and I’ve calmed down slightly. I keep telling myself that there is no reason for this not to be a normal pregnancy and then count down the days until my first scan (11 days to go!).
I don’t actually feel any different. Any ‘symptoms’ I may have experienced could truly be in my mind or have another logical explanation. So far I have experienced a metallic taste in my mouth on a few occasions, doesn’t last long though. I have had uncontrollable and unexplained irritability and anger outbursts, a bad back, period type pains, insomnia, mild nausea and have found myself to be quite weepy. My boobs have grown a considerable amount and they are very sore. However, that, along with all the other symptoms could be down to the progesterone pessaries I’ve been using.
Call me crazy, but I am desperate for a bit of morning sickness just to make me feel pregnant and so I know everything is okay.
Tomorrow marks 6 weeks. Still early, but to me each week is a massive milestone!